Tuesday, August 27, 2013

Parenting is Hard!

Ya know sometimes you just feel like you are failing as a parent... ok well maybe you don't feel that way but sometimes I sure do! Like today for instance when no matter how long and hard I tried I could not get my child to go to sleep for a nap! I dont know what it is but for me she just doesn't like to do it and heaven forbid I just put her in her bed so she can put herself to sleep. And please I really dont want to hear about how they have to learn and you need to let them cry it out or any of that other stuff because trust me I HAVE TRIED!! My child is just that MY child and just like her momma if she doesn't want to do something she's not going to do it! Unforunately my husband doesn't have a stubborn bone in his body so there is really no one else to blame but me and my entire side of the family. So after trying to put to sleep for a good half hour and then letting her cry it out for a good 20 minutes and then trying again to put her to sleep and once again letting her cry I finally gave up and just let her be up until her daddy came home a few minutes later and put her to bed with little to no problem... Do you know how frustrating that is?!?!?! He is the master at putting her to sleep and it makes me feel like a failure because I can try every trick in the book with no success and then he comes home and takes like five minutes and she's out! Lets see its tuesday and this has already happened twice this week... NOT OK!  But on top of her just fighting nap tonight she was not having going to bed. She'd fall asleep until you put her down and then she'd scream. Blaine being the trooper that he is tried and tried but finally asked for back up because we all have a breaking point. So we gave her some medicine thinking her teeth may be bothering her and then she had some mommy cuddle time and then decided she was gonna try to play... HA I dont think so... so daddy went back to putting her to bed and finally after two hours of struggling with this child she is in her bed asleep! I see all these parents that just put their child to bed and VIOLA they go to sleep... and the fact that I can't do it makes me feel like a failure! I've tried, from the get go we tried, she has never been and I'm starting to believe never will be a just lay down and go to sleep child. Maybe when she's 20! LOL!! And this is really just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to all the hardships of parenting. I mean it starts before they even born and you have to decide on how to give birth, then you have to decide to breastfeed or not and for how long, then when to start solid food and how to start solid food and what toys to buy, daycare or no daycare, and it goes on and on and on and we haven't even made it to the one year mark yet! I already have days where I feel like a failure because I can't put my child to sleep I dont even wanna know how I'm gonna feel when I make the WRONG decision about something to do with my child! Its nerve wrecking and scary and hard!! But it is all so worth it! Just that one smile and hug makes all of it worth it. The way her eyes light up and she laughs when she sees me for the first time in the morning or when I pick her up from a sitter after being away from her. The way sometimes only I can comfort her because I am mommy! It makes all the worry, stress, failing feeling. It makes it all worth it and so much more!!

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